Verbal Haze

The Bird is the Word

I’m sure you all know, the Los Angeles Lakers won the NBA Championship a little while ago. A couple things:

1-Who cares? Basketball is the only sport where the college game is distinctly more interesting than the pro version. There is such thing as too much of a good thing, and the NBA is the perfect example.

2- Kobe

For all you Kobe-lovers out there (consensual or not), don’t worry. I’m not going to rip on Kobe. It’s not worth my time, I can’t really add anything new.
What I am going to do, is call attention to a man that deserves our respect and was the main reason I was hoping Denver would win the Championship: Chris “Birdman” Anderson.
Birdman is the ultimate underdog; his story is full of highs and lows. A lot of highs. A figurative Oprah-after-enchilada-night-shitload of highs (what can I say the woman looks like she can be a destructive force on the porcelain). This is because Birdman was suspended for two years by the NBA for using “drugs of abuse”. No one really knows what drug it was that he tested positive for, but it could have been any of the following: Cocaine, LSD, Meth, PCP, Morphine, or Codeine.

Pick your favorite. (My pick: meth, it seems to fit the best)

Not only is he an ex-drug abuser, but he could also be considered to be “out of his element”, because over 80 percent of the NBA is African-American. Yet, this man still found a way to be significant. He had 14 rebounds in a conference finals game against the Lakers, and averaged 6 points and 2.5 blocks per game this year. That puts him at third overall for blocks per game and second in total blocks (behind Dwight Howard).

So the guy couldn’t hit a three or a jump shot for an 8-ball of coke, but he sure can jump.

What makes him more interesting, is that he has a more tattoo’s than the self-proclaimed “Illustrated Man”. That’s actually how he got the name Birdman, his nickname is derived from the wing tattoo’s under his arms. And apparently, when he makes a sick play, he celebrates by “flapping his wings”.

Yea, he won’t be on any top 10 lists for the greatest players of all time. But he might compete with Kobe for having the most balls.

Do Some Bird Watching:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q1vyWW8huX8&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Tn9U0ClQjU
http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x93a8q_the-birdman-soars-chris-andersen-nb_sport
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2WNrx2jq184