Archive for Article Archive

  • Damnit Smokey Damnit Smokey

    One day I was watching TV and I saw a familiar face: Smokey the Bear. I love Smokey. He always taught me about the lay of the land and reminded me of my responsibility to prevent fires in highly vegetated areas called “forests”. The alliteration that used to roll off of his bear-tongue with th...

  • Shredfest Shredfest

    Yesterday I was talking with someone I know from Vermont and how they have no professional sports teams whatsoever. Personally, I think Vermont needs some kind of sports team. Yes, there are more cows than people in Vermont and the type of people who live there aren't generally disposed towards ...

  • Rollerskating Babies Rollerskating Babies

    If you have not seen this ad by Evian, here it is. Now some of you are going awwww that sooooo cuuuuuuuute. Shut the fuck up and think about this one for a second. Maybe, just maybe it would have been cute if it was simply a video of skating babies made simply for video entertainment. Still a...

  • Be Right Back Ripping Bong Be Right Back Ripping Bong

    Yesterday was a very foggy day, and with lots of fogginess comes thoughts that may not have otherwise been thought of. Amidst this fogginess came one of those thoughts, I don't remember how it happened or what it was that caused me to think of this, but what matters is that it happened. The comm...

  • Get Fat or Get Packed Get Fat or Get Packed

    In a recent blogging about the show Merlin which premiered on ABC not more than a week ago, I predicted that the show would be lame and that the actor playing Merlin, while being quite a few years older, looks like more of a pussy than Harry Potter. I understand Harry Potter is Harry Potter, and...

  • Can't Touch This Can’t Touch This

    "A 15-year-old girl with a 500-texts-a-day texting habit thumbed her way to the $50,000 grand prize at the L.G. National Texting Championship in New York on Tuesday." First of all, I propose a hand-dexterity-competition-of-sorts between this 15-year-old texting champion and this here Japanese V...

  • Merlin the Magical Flamer Merlin the Magical Flamer

    I know Merlin could conjure flames through his magical spells, but I didn't know he was actually a flamer himself. Merlin wasn't actually a flamer, but why then is his character on the new TV series on NBC called "Merlin" look like he might be casting spells from his Book of Really Gay Magic....

  • Watcha Doin' Darrell? Watcha Doin’ Darrell?

    Sean Connery: I’ll take “Foreign Chicks” for 200. Alex Trebek: That’s “Foreign FLICKS” Mr. Connery. Sean Connery: Well, the game is afoot. I'll take “Anal Bum Cover” for 300. Alex Trebek: That's “AN ALBUM COVER”, not anal bum cover. Sean Connery: I can read, Tre...

  • The Bird is the Word The Bird is the Word

    I’m sure you all know, the Los Angeles Lakers won the NBA Championship a little while ago. A couple things: 1-Who cares? Basketball is the only sport where the college game is distinctly more interesting than the pro version. There is such thing as too much of a good thing, and the NBA is ...

  • Did Washington Ever Burn One Down? Did Washington Ever Burn One Down?

    Am I really proposing this? Yes I am, and here's why... There is no denying that many, many early American farmers used cannabis for making various things such as paper, cloth, carpets, rope, and more. During various times in our history its cultivation has even been mandatory (following Worl...

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